15th February

                                                                     DORIS

      

Doris, Oscar, Daisy and Honey

 Doris was with us for 19 glorious months.  Age unknown but estimated to be 13+ years when we adopted her. She would not have won a beauty competition but what she lacked in looks she excelled in character. When we adopted her she was unable to walk very far and surprisingly did not bark for the first  4 months. Then when she did it was for her breakfast, walks, dinner and pudding. Don't ask what that is! It is an indulgent secret that all of ours have. When giving her a treat it was like the till in Open All Hours, many was the time she beat us, Stuart and I would laugh at one another saying " She got you then!" It was not an aggressive thing but one of excitable joy.
This Sunday there was nothing unusual with Doris. Off she went with the others for their walk although Stuart came back early dropping Doris off  as she started to drag her heals and the other were still in need of more. We put this down to the bitter cold we have had plus we had just brought her a knitted tube coat to keep her warm. Doris settled on her bed as normal placing her ball at her side.
During the afternoon it became apparent that she was under the weather, shaking occasionally. Dinner time, she was not interested in her food. Stuart took her upstairs to lay on the bed whilst he worked on the computer, watching over her. He called me upstairs to see Doris at 6.30pm, she was laying flat not even lifting her head. We realised that we need to take her to the emergency vet attached to out veterinary practice. Stuart and I have no confidence in this surgery due to experiences in the past, we scoured the internet for an alternative one, which was 50 miles away! We had no other option, the dinner was turned off whilst still in the oven, Doris wrapped up in a blanket and off we went. On arrival we were taken straight into the consultation room. THEN the bombshell! The vet told us Doris was very ill with a temp of 40, dehydrated and her heart rate is very slow and missing a beat and it is possibly cancer he gave us three options.
1. Leave her there and they will put her on a drip with antibiotics and carry out tests tomorrow.2. He would give her an injection of antibiotics and anti inflammatories which will help to bring her temp down and we take her home.

Stuart on the floor sleeping with Doris.

3. We have her PTS.
We decided option 2. Although she was a strong old girl we knew that option 3 was not far away maybe even Monday. Doris perked up and now could hold her head up. So we made the most of Sunday night surrounding her with love and cuddles. Doris had been a stray with a PTS date probably dumped from a car. and we vowed that when it was her time she would not die on a cold concrete floor but with us in her own home. Doris had slept for two hours in her bed. Stuart sleeping on the floor next to her. We decided it was best this way just in case she woke up and tried to jump off our bed and we were to much in a deep sleep. Doris was very weak and just managed to turn herself around. She managed to get up for water, banging her head on the cupboard door staggering, she wanted to go in the garden for her toilet still trying to be clean, helping her every step of the way it was pitiful. It felt cold, it is amazing how cold you feel in the early hours of the morning and as they say this is when your body is at its lowest ebb.Silently we both realised that it was not fair for Doris to go through this and in our hearts we already knew.  She lifted her head and as you stroked her she put her head in our hands gently closing her eyes enjoying the caressing that is given to her. Knowing all that she had been through in life yet she was still so trusting.

Doris on the common carrying  her favourite ball

8am Doris wrapped in her blanket we drove through the rush hour traffic to our vets. We were ushered in straight away, they confirmed that Doris has probably got cancer in the abdomen as there were no other symptoms and her temperature was still 40. It is the bodies mechanism trying to fight off the cancer. They could do blood test, scan her, in which they would have to sedate her, the outcome would be the same. Stuart and I always swore that she would not be PTS anywhere else but at home, her home. After being a stray and in a pound. Our lovely sweet old Doris would be surrounded by love and not discarded like she had been before.
We brought Doris home to have her PTS in her own home, on her own bed with us at her side. Lindsey our vet and Vicky the nurse arrived at 11.30am. Knowing all our dogs they made a fuss of them and we took them upstairs. I cuddled Doris, Stuart stroking her and Vicky telling her how beautiful and lovely she was, Lindsey administered the heart stopping injection. Doris died peacefully in our arms at home. We brought Daisy, Honey, Oscar and Luci in to say farewell to their friend. They sniffed at her mouth and ears silently walked away and settled. In doing this we felt that they would not be looking for her or awaiting her return.

Our sweet beautiful Doris. Run wild and free xxxx

We have a secret, you and I,
that no-one else shall know,
for who, but I can see you lie,
each night, in fireglow?
and who but I can reach my hand
before we go to bed,
feel the living warmth of you
and touch your silken head?
Only I walk woodland paths,
and see, ahead of me,
your small form racing with the wind,
so young again, and free.
and only I can see you swim
in every stream I pass,
and when I call, no one but I can see the bending grass.
 
Monday night Stuart gave Daisy, Honey and Oscar their puddings and he thought he heard Doris barking for her's and said that his mind was playing tricks on him.
 Doris's ashes are in a box next to Percy's. Stuart does not want them scattered together but has said he wants them put with him, when he goes. Poor undertakers they will have a heavy load to carry!!!!!                                                                                

Nugget

 Stuart and I do not regret one moment and a piece of our heart has Doris's name firmly on it and will do it all again. It does not matter whether you have a dog for a month or 12 years the pain is the same. 
There is an old girl waiting in the wings, her name is Nugget at Battersea Dogs and Cats Home aged 15 years who we had expressed an interest prior to Doris's death. she has some medical problems at present  but who knows! She may take up that comfy bed by the fire for as long as she needs it.



Cherish every moment for who knows what tomorrow may bring.


Author :- Valerie with thanks to Doris our star RIP